Top 10 Things You Can Learn from the Kim/Kris Divorce
10. Kris Jenner’s got something up her sleeve, and it’s likely crack laced with what remains of your integrity. Avoid at all costs.
9. Finding out where your future spouse hopes to settle down is of utmost importance and should take place before the words nationally televised wedding cross one’s lips.
8. If you as the groom share the same name as your future mother in law, you likely have a problem.
7. Engagement celebrations are not a time for “mini-horses covered in glitter” or your entire family adorning fake engagement rings. That’s just weird and creepy.
6. If your wedding has a title, you have a problem. Get out while you can.
5. If your wedding has a title and it is anywhere similar to “Kim’s Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event,” your life is a fictional rouse. Abort mission immediately.
4. The number of dresses a bride wears at her wedding is not correlated to how long her union will last.
3. You must never believe anything that E! broadcasts in a continuous loop, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week (or anything produced by Ryan Seacrest for that matter).
2. Diamonds aren’t forever. Even when they cost $1 million and weigh as much as a baby kitten.
1. The Kardashians are rotting our brains.
End of story.
Xo
SFAR