My boyfriend came home from a business trip in Toronto and relayed the following story he’d heard from a group of male colleagues:
Once upon a time, a young man brought a young woman home to his place where they made out and started to get hot and heavy. It was their first time hooking up.
At some point, the guy asked if she wanted to get “slippy-slidey.” Though she had no idea what he was referring to, she said yes.
He led her into his bedroom, tore off the sheets and revealed the plastic surface of his water bed. From there, he proceeded to pull out a jug of Mazola cooking oil and pour it all over the rubber mattress. He then undressed and dove headfirst on to the lubed up waterbed.
Because the surface was so slick he slammed head first in to the headboard.
The young woman ran over to see if he was okay, quickly realizing he’d knocked himself unconscious. Despite the fact that she did not know where she was, or what his name was, she searched for the phone and called 911. An ambulance arrived to collect the unconscious man….still lubed up….still naked. And the young woman got the hell out of dodge.
SFAR
Rejected for Free Fries at the BK Lounge
So I return to the city where I am going to grad school after a summer away. I naturally started talking to the guy I had been seeing before we left for the break. We went out for beers a few times…he bought. He brought me a present from when he went to visit his family for a weekend. He made dinner and invited me to join. Nothing physical had happened between us yet.
Then on gchat one night he asked how my dating life was going, I was assuming he would suggest giving us a go because we had been hanging out. I said it was pretty uneventful, to which he responded:
guy: been seeing a local girl for little while
me: thats exciting
guy: yeah, she works at the bk lounge
gives me discounts on fries all the time
Thanks for mentioning that a month ago… enjoy your fast food loving in the BK Lounge.
[Image Source: Gawker]
Editorial note: How disgusting and degrading is this advertisement??